A Hidden Dream

It's 3.08am, and still not sleeping..I just really NEED to blog, my hands been itching like god knows since my last post. Though I won't be return back to the pass, it will always be a memory to hold on. There are so many precious memories which we both hold, till now. It is so nice to meet your soul mate, but once you decided to go back, you'll have this sucky feeling of leaving something valuable behind. Which isn't fun at all. Here in KL, there's nothing for me to relate to.. I mean, I don't even have any of that feeling anymore. And I think it's kinda sucky to make a new one here, cuz then, it won't have any meaning at all, not that I don't try to, but maybe it just something like both of us keep lying to each other, hiding too many things, because we don't even build our relationship here for the sake of sharing... It's so bizzare...I hate the feeling of prejudice cuz the scar still there and the wound seems like bleeding again..

" I bear in mind for what you've ever said...

Sensed of rejection, keeping my mouth shut...

Cold arguement and just walk away... "

So again, from the beginning, I need to understand that expression of the unhappiness need to be the priority while I try to really understand that he's not the 9 - 5 person, which have his own vision, goals and objective to strive...

But do you really listen for what I've mumbling on? You have read lots of books of management and communication, body languages, expression, impression and so on... Could you ever get the main point? I don't ask for a prediction or telepathy... But maybe or perhaps, some way or some how, I just feel lonely even when you around..How sucky it be !!! 


For some point, I rather to make a pull stop and move on...In a between of the junction, I rather to go back where I belongs to and where people accept who I am and need me...To the end point of each junction, what I do really need is a lil' laugh, smile and cuddles...I'll be a good as good that you'll ever seen...