i felt sick !!

"you make my day"
this sentence always come out from my mouth lately....

i dont know...i just like to say so...

even for my requestor in Australia...
complaining this and that...
following this and that..
even saying that i'm performing well while keep on mumbling...

even i feel so bad...
even i feel so sick...
even i feel so lost...

the sentence will make me better...
eventhou...my friend would say...
" are you mad ?? you still can laugh ?? what so funny ?? "

i duno...i just keep on going
just keep pushing on...

i dont want to think anymore...
i rather not to think anything...
rather that just switch it off...
like i said it before for some1 that could be my friend but then just dissapeared like that...
i dont know...
a friend that make my day...

Now...
i felt really dizzy...
still got a lot of things that needs to follow up...
i felt really sick..
i felt like vomitting...
gosh...

Last Saturday night...
i fainted...
just really suddenly black-out...
luckily got some1 bside me...
huh....been so long that i dont feel sick that much...

i dont know....
i hope you could be there...
to hold me again...
but there will be no more YOU...

while i still aware...
half awake actually...
i really felt so cold and yet im sweating...
stay overnight at my friend house, saying that my face really pale, white and greenish...
lolzz...i told why din take pic, thn the answer will be " are you crazy?? im already freak out and you still can laugh there and ask me take picture.. " then i say " ok... i wan sleep now..." the end...
sleep whole nite till the morning... after been force eat porridge and hot milo...only can ate for less than 10 spoon...maybe?? thn drank the milo for 1/3 of the glass...im really feel weak...my voices dont even can come out... hmmm..... black out again...

Scar

" I know I hurt you....

Really Sorry...

Times flies...

Be happy k...

Take care... "

i lost to this word...

i lost to the sentence...

i lost everything and gain another things...

that i dont even know i really want it or not...

for sure... i lost it...

everything will be fine ???

did i really recovered from it ??

bullshitting to the tears...

i'm sorry...

i can't stand it anymore...

i break the promised as u had broke it long ago...

promised to not to cry anymore...

but the heart and feeling so stubborn...

and the tears come out without stopping...

i'm sorry and i know it's not worthy anymore at all...

while typing this, i hope you could understand and could hear it...

i listen to you and i know it will hurt...

its too late to me neither you to come back...

a bullshit

damn...!!
coward...!!
loser...!!
fucker...!!
shit...!!

ths is what i felt rite now....

its really annoying...
no responsibility at all...
and much more...
who acting nonsense....

cant slept well...
really irritating...
who acting weird...
who acting funny...
and its such a sucker....

damn....
wish that all of thm happily ever after...
huh...aftr treating me like this...
im ok wif it...and im fine...

* sorry for the bad word that appear and come out *

i know i am crazy

i know i am weird

i dont need ppl to understand me

i know i am daring (mayb a bit)

i know i will lose of control yet i am the 1 who controlling it

you bet on me, you'll lost !!

New Piercing

a day out wif my best-pal...
Dato' Ayub ~~
hehhee...he the one best pal i have in KL...
he the 1st person i met in KL dat become my pal...

last Friday is he on Off Day...
he wait me at Sg.Wang cuz i promise him to buka puasa together...
aftr work, i go and met him...
go around and went to Times Square...

he decided to buka puasa at MarryBrown...
so..up to him..since im not dat choosy in eating...
he reserved for porridge, chic rendang set, fried chic, air sirap and orange...
then we continue to hang around in Times Square...

whn hang around...
i told him i wan do something dat i never do....
i told him maybe piercing will do..
and he juz brg me to thr...
as who noe me...
i juz like ' come..lets go ' without thinking...
' juz do it do it ' kinda gal...maybe it juz bcuz of sumthg...
lolz...dun wan mention it...

k..here the snap shot dat i took...

here is Dato' Ayub ~ used to called him Dato' since he likes to call me Datin..

fride chic set

porridge - i like it...nyum nyum ~~

chic rendang rice set

my new piercing...

damn pain lur...

shouting and my tears drop aftr dat..

and he still can laugh...

still reddish...huhuhu
* sob sob *

thx Ayub... i noe u noe dat i had a hard time...

and yet...u still accompany me...

you noe dat im pretending, acting and try to be strong

you noe dat im in pain...

u advise me to juz let it be...

i will...

i will let it be..

if it mine..

it will come back to me..

lets the time be...

On the Road

hehehhe..on the way back to bazaar ramadhan at Wangsa Maju...
juz snapping own pix while Eisz is driving....

here the QQ bear bear in his car...

hmmm...wanna gib a nick to both of it...

on the left is - Fluffy

the right beside it is Beary

uopsss...dont tell Eisz...he duno this...

hhhehehheehe....

snapping thru the window and catch it to the mirror xD

LOLzX ~~

hmmm...act cool...
hahhaha...not even noe hw to act on it...

Deco - Raya

should b post it last monday...
but im too lazy...
wat to do... hehhehehe...
here is our activity for raya celeb...
onli a simple deco actually....

here is the stuff - eisz the one dat bought all ths thg..

frm left - Kellen , Raj, Dash, & Eisz

LOLz - crazy me ~

me - snapping and disturbing pplz...hehhehhe...

InSecurity

Feeling slighty uneasy about life
I'm not sure why....
from low-level anxiety to the high pressure of life..
i hope that i could rest assured that it will pass

yeah...that's right...
that im in a period of insecurity,
i only hope that i could feel stable and secure again.... soon!!
these fears are merely...
wish to have an otherwise smooth road..

It's Broken

duh....
what a day...
early in the morning i drop the glasses bottle..
damn...
dont know what's wrong with me....
some more, infront the office door...
im looking for my access card actually, but then...
pranggggg....the glasses fall down and its broken...
luckily the glasses didnt hit my leg...

only sleep for 2 and half hour....
get to the room at 1.30am
cant even sleep well actually...
laying on the bed....wondering...
around 3 something only i fall asleep...
wake at 5 am...
duh...still blur blurrr...
i duno what's goin on wif me...
i cant feel the feeling...
weird huh...
thinking and wondering...
i might make some1 angry with me...and i apologize but there is no response i get...
thinking of this month...make me even sad...

last night, having web caming wif my beloved wei wei...
at least, she make me smile...
with her funny and cute face....
she the only 1 that i have after all...
love her so much...
hope she will get well soon....

p/: hope nothing worse that will happen today...
cross fingered and knock the table...

Pix Sa @ PD

kidzz...dun try ths...

ice breaking ...

preparing thestuff for BBQ ~

starting the convoy @@

playing ballzz

sport xtvt

playing card session **

pokerzz

the cars ^^

dat so awesome !! hahahhaha

half naked !!

make a wish dude ..

BBQ Session

weeeee ~~

fire burning ^^

Leonard Loo

Leonard B'day cum trip to PD

an awesome day and weekend i had...
30th Aug went to Bar C.. meeting wif all the fren thr...meet up point...
havin fun thr...

hmm...not in the blogging mood actually...
only feel nid to upload pix...
for sum of the day is
- meet up point ~ Bar C @ Sunway
- sober up at Mc D @ Cheras
- heading to Ocean View @ PD
- having BBQ

here is the star of dat nite ~ Leonard ~

Konvoy car... sweet ~

grouping photo ^^

Bak Kut Teh session - 1st table

Bak Kut Teh session - 2nd table

will upload more pic later...

~~ And I ~~

and i made up my mind
i'm in love this time
and it feels so real

I LOVE YOU
and all the things you do...

yawning ~~

keep on yawning !!...
wake up at 5am as usual...
onli get ready at 5.30am...
lazy ~~ lazy ~~

lazy to work as usual...
no mood as usual...
dont tempt to have a work...
dont feel doing anythg...
lazy checking my mailbox and all those request...pending...bla bla bla...

wat to do next...
thkg...

hmmm....
still listening to the music...
huh...chinesse songs ??
what's wrong wif me??
ths few days..??

forget about it...
new quote last nite in FB : " Love me - stay, Hate me - who care; upside down - its all about me !! "

to do list today -
1. checking my whole mailbox - try to do as much as i could finish
2. hope dat i could back on time - lazy to hang out in the off ady...
3. i want to close 1 of my acc bank - long time din update...
4. re-arrange again my room - bought new hanger clothes last nite...
5. update my blog - new pix nid to uplod during leonard birthday...

chowwww....

miss ya dear....to everyone dat love me...
I love you all wif all of my heart !!!
muackszzz.......