Merry Christmas 2010

HO HO HO....

Merry Christmas :) :)

another year to be ahead ~~~

well, I do miss them...

and here I am...

wishing and praying to GOD...

Dear GOD, another year had passed...

celebrating the joy that YOU'VE joined us in this world..

I am pretty sure that all around the world is celebrating and praise the joyful to you...

for the thanksgiving, for the reunion, for the happiness, 

for the memorable....

Dear GOD... 

I wish everyone have the good year ahead yet the healthiness be with everybody...

well, I just wanna continue my wishes to him...

hope he could hear it loud... : D

MERRY CHRISTMAS 2010 everyone...

cheers : )

Before 2011

Before 2011 comes,
Do you wanna

1) Date me
2) Get back with me
3) Meet me in person...
4) Surprise me
5) Be my bestfriend
6) Laugh with me
7) Go out with me
8) Text me for the whole night
9) Have a heart to heart talk
10) Get Drunk with me
11) Sing with me
12) Go hunting with me





hahahahaa....well, duh = =||
kinda kinky....
for sure and certainly....the tears gonna drop again ~~~
well, tears....for a losing, for a happiness, for missing ......

My Interpretation

Everything in between,
Like it's nothing, and the words are easy.
And everything I do,
Like it's something, that needs repeating.
I don't need an alibi or for you to realize,
The things we left unsaid,
Are only taking space up in our head.
Make it my fault, win the game
Point the finger, place the blame
It does me up and down,
It doesn't matter now.


This is not about emotion,
I don't need a reason not to care what you say,
Or what happened in the end.


I hold my breath and wonder when it'll happen,
Does it really matter?
If half of what you said is true,
And half of what I didn't do could be different,
Would it make it better?
If we forget the things we know.
Would we have somewhere to go?


It's really not such a sacrifice

"Cinderella"

I'd lie in bed and think about the person that I wanted to be
Then one day I realized the fairy tale life wasn't for me


I don't wanna be like Cinderella
Sitting in a dark old dusty cellar
Waiting for somebody, to come and set me free
I don't wanna be like Snow White waiting
For a handsome prince to come and save me
On a horse of white, unless we're riding side by side
Don't want to depend on no-one else
I'd rather rescue myself

Someday I'm gonna find someone who wants my soul, heart and mind
Who's not afraid to show that he loves me
Somebody who will understand I'm happy just the way I am 
Don't need nobody taking care of me

I will be there for him just as strong as he, will be there for me
When I give myself then it has got to be, an equal thing

Out up to the sea ~~

well...
I know it's kinda late for posting the late vacation I have...

went down to Krabi, Thailand on 2nd to 5th last November..
so, the journey began....

things that needed... 

yeah...a day before go back to Malaysia..

suppose to hunt for souvenir and get some relax massage night...

end up with the artificial of birth mark? LOL

Breakfast with all by our self.. > <

some of the panorama... OH MY !!

forgot what island that we went to..

the fish there are superb hungry...

yeah...the FISH IS EATING me !!! huhuhuhu...
so people, when you come out for island hop, remember to bring along some of dishes ( I mean bread loaf - a plain 1, okey ) for those hungry lil' sea creature out there... :)

kinda wanna have a snorkeling... which I'm just hanging around the boat... :P 

flea market?? hmmm.... :o
you must know how to bargain and please...don't so ridiculous...
if not you gonna end up with the "CRAZY" statement... = . =

departing and arriving *sigh*

1st thing that we do after reach our resort..

getting on with the trunk and bikini... 

buahahhahaha.... ;p

photo session..with some weird funny act ... = =||

yupes !!! it's Kimberly, Dane, Jo Vin, Tommy and I ....

oh my!! oh my !!

this is killing me !! I love the chicken meat...

the chicken so juicy so tender...and yeah I fall in love with the grill chicken...

for those who like fish a lot, please and please as what I observe Krabi people got lotsa salt...
urm... I mean they put the salt like nobody business..

yes !! you hear me...it's salty !! lotsa salt on the fish skin... hmmm..

and yes, the fish is really fresh...
so, don't judge from the outside huh !!!

huhuhu...forgot to say bout the tom yam !!

nyum nyum... so so sooooo on nom nommm.... hehehe

can't forget when Kim's tear dropped while looking at Jo, Dane and Tommy with those red face... xD

yeah...thought bout this transport !!!

it's really nice.. I think Malaysia should have this..

it's kinda a Beca wannabe... urmmm...actually its Beca conversion to a motorbike

well...its the TUK TUK ...

affordable and fancy !!

and yes people it air-cond free.. :D

hmm...waiting for the rest of tourist for an island hoping...

just nothing to do...

yupes....you see this people !!

I got mine as well...

hmmm...after a long thought...

for the sake of god !!!

it is really weird feeling when the needle keep puking me..

due to my tummy full of air...dwelling with lots of gas...

none of them wanna grab something to eat !!! DENG at them !!

yeah...this is my 5 hours of waiting and I get this on my back !! 

DAMN at them for make this at me !!

hahhahaa....1 people wanna do all is following...

fly fly fly...butterfly ~~~

place where we stay... xD

"Sala Talay Resort"

Way to Cheerful

hmmm...coughing all the way morning while I'm still in unconscious...
from my dream...
yeah...I don't want to wake yet...
still wanna see the face that gone long time ago...
a face that I always wanted to see...
a face that always protect me...
a face that always be there for me...

owh...just notice that I didn't bring any picture of him...

make a phone call to mummy and Along..
told sis and Along... that I miss him so much... I dream of him... I want him back...

yeah...it sound crazy...while talking my tears couldn't be stop...
it's just like a heavy rain and more like a small baby asking for an ice cream...
yeah... I'm scared... I just wanted to have his hand on me again...

That's What Counts

Words play an important part in our life!

TEN important words:

"The more your learn, the more you want to know"

NINE important words:

"The shortest distance between two people is a smile"

EIGHT important words:

"Sometimes silence is the best substitute for brains"

SEVEN important words:

"You can't shake hands with a fist!"

SIX important words:

"I admit I make a mistake!"

FIVE important words:

"You did a good job!"

FOUR important words:

"You so beautiful today"

THREE important words:

"What's your opinion?"

TWO important words:

"Thank you"

the ONE important words:

"WE"

the LEAST important word is:

" I "

Well, the important things is everything play the role how and in what way it should play...

I  hope I'm not the LEAST neither the BOTTOM neck of the important things in everybody life :)

Success is love

There are some things success is not.

It’s not fame, money or power…

Success is waking up in the morning,

So excited about what you have to do

That you literally fly out the door...

It’s getting to work with people you love....

Success is connecting with the world and making people feel.

It’s finding a way to bind together people who have nothing common but a dream..

It’s falling asleep at night knowing you did the best job you could.

Success is joy and freedom and friendship.

And success is love…

Just like I always wanted

Say you're sorry, that face of an angel

Comes out just when you need it

As I paced back and forth this time

Cause I honestly believed you

Baby I was naive, got lost in your eyes

And never really have a chance

I had so many dreams

Just like I always wanted

Cause I'm not your princess

This ain't a fairytale........................................

Unproductive Competency

I been trying to search around..

kinda late for me?

at this stage? 

at this age?

looking for a better way to gain something that I could hold on...

yeah....people say it's never too late....

never too soon...

but people would not understand if they not in my shoe...or maybe in your shoe...

talk about an unproductive competency...

was wondering due to my miserable career path...

still searching what I do like...

where would it gonna be end...duh !! don't think that I start any to end it up...

Unproductive Competency - It is a wasted skill, knowledge and experience or training which are not utilised in the workplace due to many factors which block performance...

1. People are not provide with the opportunity...
2. People are not motivated to apply what they know...
3. Superiors override subordinates' better ideas...
4. People are afraid to apply what they know...
5. Company has not exploited new opportunities to use new competency...
6. The competency does not relevance neither the employee nor to the company...
7. The corporate culture prevents people from using their competency...

to be frank....all the list above is under my miserable career...

I do not know where to start...where to build...

Lesson

It's been awhile for me to stop writing...

kinda stopping as I'm not sure how to express myself...

how to deal with it...

how to face it...

does it really make me thinks twice thrice even it keep on repeating in my small tiny mind...

rather than talking...it's make me think...

what is my word?

what words is mine?

representing who am I ?

I may not be a good talker neither to have lotsa friends like you do...

I may not seen the whole world out there...

but I am trying to build it..

to see it...

to gain it...

to learn it...

I may try to change myself to be a better me...

to be some one that could stand out from others...

to be the one that wouldn't be that so naive...

to be the one that wouldn't so touchy...

to be the one that could really match to the world out side there....

but please... it couldn't be happen in just a single click of finger tip...

it couldn't be just happen in a few second after what I wish to be...

I couldn't be as pro as good as you are...

I am learning...and everyday I do learning...

I see from a different view of everything...

I listen to surround rather than to start talking out loud...

critical path is to gain the experience...

each of the experiences, teaching me when to start to sit, crawl, walk, run...

and now it's teach me how and when to start to talk and listen...

♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

I Cried When I Knew I Lost You, 
Afraid I Had Lost It All. 
Then I Realized That Losing You, 
Didn't Have To Mean I Lost Me

Blessed

This is great; take a moment to read it,

It will make your day!
The ending will surprise you 

A wealthy man and his son loved to collect rare works of art. They had everything in their collection, from Picasso to Raphael. They would often sit together and admire the great works of art.

  When the Vietnam conflict broke out, the son went to war. He was very courageous and died in battle while rescuing another soldier. The father was notified and grieved deeply for his only son.
 

About a month later, just before Christmas, there was a knock at the door. A young man stood at the door with a large package in his hands.

He said, 'Sir, you don't know me, but I am the soldier for whom your son gave his life. He saved many lives that day, and he was carrying me to safety when a bullet struck him in the heart and he died instantly. He often talked about you, and your love for art.' The young man held out this package. 'I know this isn't much. I'm not really a great artist, but I think your son would have wanted you to have this.'

The father opened the package. It was a portrait of his son, painted by the young man... He stared in awe at the way the soldier had captured the personality of his son in the painting. The father was so drawn to the eyes that his own eyes welled up with tears. He thanked the young man and offered to pay him for the picture. 'Oh, no sir, I could never repay what your son did for me. It's a gift.' 

The father hung the portrait over his mantle. Every time visitors came to his home he took them to see the portrait of his son before he showed them any of the other great works he had collected.  

The man died a few months later. There was to be a great auction of his paintings. Many influential people gathered, excited over seeing the great paintings and having an opportunity to purchase one for their collection.  

On the platform sat the painting of the son. The auctioneer pounded his gavel. 'We will start the bidding with this picture of the son. Who will bid for this picture?'  

There was silence...  

Then a voice in the back of the room shouted, 'We want to see the famous paintings. Skip this one.' 

But the auctioneer persisted. 'Will somebody bid for this painting? Who will start the bidding? $100, $200?'  

Another voice angrily. 'We didn't come to see this painting. We came to see the Van Gogh's, the Rembrandts. Get on with the real bids!'

But still the auctioneer continued. 'The son! The son! Who'll take the son?'

Finally, a voice came from the very back of the room. It was the longtime gardener of the man and his son. 'I'll give $10 for the painting....’ Being a poor man, it was all he could afford.

'We have $10, who will bid $20?'

'Give it to him for $10. Let's see the masters.'

The crowd was becoming angry.

They didn't want the picture of the son.

They wanted the more worthy investments for their collections.
The auctioneer pounded the gravel. '

Going once, twice, SOLD for $10!'

A man sitting on the second row shouted,’

Now let's get on with the collection!' 

The auctioneer laid down his gravel. 'I'm sorry, the auction is over.'  

'What about the paintings?'

'I am sorry. When I was called to conduct this auction, I was told of a secret stipulation in the will. I was not allowed to reveal that stipulation until this time. Only the painting of the son would be auctioned. Whoever bought that painting would inherit the entire estate, including the paintings.  

The man who took the son gets everything!'  

God gave His son 2,000 years ago to die on the cross. Much like the auctioneer, His message today is: 'The son, the son, who'll take the son?'  

Because, you see, whoever takes the Son gets everything.

  

FOR GOD SO LOVED THE WORLD HE GAVE HIS ONLY BEGOTTEN SON, WHO SO EVER BELIEVETH, SHALL HAVE ETERNAL LIFE....THAT'S LOVE

It is and always

you break my heart...no matter what reason you said..its doesnt approve any rational on it thou you faking on my appearance...

I Love You

If...

Disaster Strom

ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH....................................

I'm in disaster mood now!!!
it's no longer windy but a thunder storm with a lighting everywhere...
yeah...everywhere !!!

I'm almost giving up...
and let it be what it want's to be...

the ignorance...not the attention that I need,
only something that I could hold on it...

im my little mind...
"should I or shouldn't I ? "

Owl..boop boop ~~

Again…
The night never be as peaceful ever
A night that always make me awake
Am I’m thinking too much?
And it’s seemed really true and real even in the dream…

The only expression that I could give is
Only a silent mode and hoping that my brain stop thinking…
I mean by not think anything….
Duh… brain stop thinking = dead ?
- . = ||

yeah…just keep going and pushing on….
There always be an uphill battle…

A dream…
Heart pounding even harder and harder…
A nightmare?
Awakening with a shaken body
Distracted it by only make a call or message to the beloved one….
Hoping it could cool down the pressure and stressful…
While the tear keep dropping silently…

When it comes to TRUE LOVE...

If you could sing, you wouldn’t be out in this heat, trying to entice someone to drive off in that convertible...

Fate couldn’t be that cruel, could it?
It just wouldn’t be fair!!

Do you really think you’ll find a genuine guy among all those pretenders?

A girl can dream...

And dreaming was all I ever did and it was time to either make those dreams come true, or settle for what I already had...

No one has ever made me feel this way before...
Could he be the one?
But when a romantic road trip is sidetracked a diamond heists and admits he’s involved,
I am not sure anymore that he’s my Prince Charming...

Now I’ll have to discover if he is steering her straight toward heartbreak or if he’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me...

Kisses don’t lie !!!

Body Language

Materialistic
Demanding
All came along with a feeling called security...

People changed as life goes on...
Not everyone!!!
Some been pampered all the way of their journey of life...
Even get involve in a slightly tough day, there always someone be there to give a hand..
Some even couldn’t get or learn anything from the experiences they got...
As they couldn’t get what was the underneath of the lesson and couldn’t even mature them...

I tried to absorb every single new things and lesson everyday
And learn anything in pretty much of everything as much as I could...

The LIES
The UGLY THRUTH
The BETRAYEL

Still, I’m avoiding all the circumstances...
Pretty much of silences...
As any word came out would not be taken back...

Holding On

Daaa...

I don't know what i feel now...

Ever since...

I never felt any security in myself...

Not even anything...

Friends....Money.... or even Myself

Thus family couldn’t make me safe, enough...

What am I holding on...

Is only something that I couldn’t catch

My soul?

Following the life routine...

Wake up, bathing, preparing self, work, chi chi cha cha, back home...

Life goes on...

And another day wasted..

Without any secured and happiness...

While I’m smiling and laughing...

And I am pretty much of grateful on what I had...

Envy?

Jealousy?

Ambitious?

Attitude?

Ability?

Maybe I just lost my believer...

Yet, there is no trust in anywhere, anybody.....

Frustrated...

Hateful...

Forgiven...

Forgotten...

You name it....

Again, my mind goes to something that makes my heart keep pounding even harder, faster and producing more sweat; came along with a shaking body...

Yeah, I’m scared!!!

And I hate it when it makes me feel really uneasy and unsecure!!!